I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize