i always forget guys have bellybuttons
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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