OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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