But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
