Me too!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i drank out of a bidet.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
