He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
