I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
