we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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