Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
