Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Randomize
