Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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