In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
