of course. lets lasso hookers.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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