if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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