return my video game
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
