we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She told me I should be a condom model.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Randomize
