bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
So many bounce houses so little time
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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