There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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