we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Actions speak louder than pants.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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