these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Randomize
