My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
