My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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