So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
operation have a gay friend backfired
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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