I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
