either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
