my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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