and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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