No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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