I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
