Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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