What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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