I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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