I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize