Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
