Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
