he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
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