careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
