I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
