I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize