i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
