I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Fuck appropriateness.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
