census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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