i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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