If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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