woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
