actually, I'm a sock model
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
