Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize