hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
