I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
