so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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