so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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