fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
