Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
