Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
