I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
if only i could text you this smell
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
